I would not be surprised if people would describe me as an independent person. I think I am, or shall I say, I project such image.
I think I am, in one way or another. The way I think shows how I do not depend on others’ opinion. I respect their opinion but it doesn’t mean I am wrong or that they are the ones who are wrong. The way I do things shows that I can do it without their help. Of course, I will be the first one to admit and shout for help if I know I can’t do it. But I try first if I could.
I think I can’t just say that one person is truly independent. Hello … we are social beings. Remember … no man is an island! We are living in this world where we depend on each other in all the things that we do.
But I am not referring to that kind of independence. I am referring to that kind of independence which affects on how we make our choices.
I think there was one time in high school when we were asked when was the last time I felt free. I wrote that it was those years that I was a baby. Of course, I can’t remember anything at that time (wonder child na ako pag-ganun). I just based on the fact on how babies live their life. They cry when they feel like it. They sleep whenever they can. They can choose not to drink milk if they are not in the mood to do so.
As we grow older, a number of restrictions are now being imposed on us. We have to obey our parents and teachers. And of course, there are those laws imposed on us, which we have to obey, even if we don’t what the laws are. (Pano kaya yun?) Basta, ignorance of the law excuses no one from compliance therewith.
Total independence is that being able to do all the things you want to do without fear or fervor, without care or concern. Just being able to do what you want to do. I don’t think anybody could have that kind of independence. If there is, let me know.
When I chose to go back and study here in Davao, I know I would give up the kind of independence I had when I was working.
I gave up being financially independent. Of course, I do have some money saved. But it’s different since my dad pays for my allowance and tuition. And I don’t share in the expenses here at home.
Unlike when I was working, I was free to decide where to go on weekends and Friday nights. I could be easily invited to go to places and do things. It was all based on my own decision.
But now that I am back here, I have a lot of things to consider. It’s not that I am being restricted, because I am not. It’s just that I have to let people know where I am and what time I get to go home. It’s just that I have to think that there are people who are concerned about me. It’s not that they are not concerned about me when I was working. It’s just that it’s different now because I am with them.
Unlike the past 3 years that I worked, I have to think of the people around me. I have to consider that I am living a well-balanced life – family, school and friends.
It’s just that there are times I can’t help but compare. When I was working, I could choose what time I get to go home on a Friday night. I could watch a movie with my officemates and have dinner afterwards. I could choose to just stay at home and watch TV, without worrying about those who worry about me.
During all my school years, I was never the type who would stay out late. I was happy staying at home and watching TV. Aside from the retreats, I can remember only 2 overnights when I was in college – one was for a project and the other one was for a deliberation for an organization. I seldom stay late, just for those occasional Christmas parties, school programs and the like. Asking permission was never an issue since I choose to stay at home.
Don’t get me wrong, I still get to choose. But being that person who wouldn’t want others to worry about me, I choose to restrict my choices. Unlike before when all I had to think of was me and work, I now take into consideration other factors as well.
Nevertheless, I am not complaining because I know I am blessed. A number of people in this world would love to be in my position – to be surrounded by such persons who are so concerned about me. I am grateful because I have lived and living this kind of life. I am thankful because I got the chance to be independent in varying degrees.
I may not be totally free nor do I wish for that one ultimate independence day. But it does not mean am not independent because I feel I am. And that is what is important :)
I think I am, in one way or another. The way I think shows how I do not depend on others’ opinion. I respect their opinion but it doesn’t mean I am wrong or that they are the ones who are wrong. The way I do things shows that I can do it without their help. Of course, I will be the first one to admit and shout for help if I know I can’t do it. But I try first if I could.
I think I can’t just say that one person is truly independent. Hello … we are social beings. Remember … no man is an island! We are living in this world where we depend on each other in all the things that we do.
But I am not referring to that kind of independence. I am referring to that kind of independence which affects on how we make our choices.
I think there was one time in high school when we were asked when was the last time I felt free. I wrote that it was those years that I was a baby. Of course, I can’t remember anything at that time (wonder child na ako pag-ganun). I just based on the fact on how babies live their life. They cry when they feel like it. They sleep whenever they can. They can choose not to drink milk if they are not in the mood to do so.
As we grow older, a number of restrictions are now being imposed on us. We have to obey our parents and teachers. And of course, there are those laws imposed on us, which we have to obey, even if we don’t what the laws are. (Pano kaya yun?) Basta, ignorance of the law excuses no one from compliance therewith.
Total independence is that being able to do all the things you want to do without fear or fervor, without care or concern. Just being able to do what you want to do. I don’t think anybody could have that kind of independence. If there is, let me know.
When I chose to go back and study here in Davao, I know I would give up the kind of independence I had when I was working.
I gave up being financially independent. Of course, I do have some money saved. But it’s different since my dad pays for my allowance and tuition. And I don’t share in the expenses here at home.
Unlike when I was working, I was free to decide where to go on weekends and Friday nights. I could be easily invited to go to places and do things. It was all based on my own decision.
But now that I am back here, I have a lot of things to consider. It’s not that I am being restricted, because I am not. It’s just that I have to let people know where I am and what time I get to go home. It’s just that I have to think that there are people who are concerned about me. It’s not that they are not concerned about me when I was working. It’s just that it’s different now because I am with them.
Unlike the past 3 years that I worked, I have to think of the people around me. I have to consider that I am living a well-balanced life – family, school and friends.
It’s just that there are times I can’t help but compare. When I was working, I could choose what time I get to go home on a Friday night. I could watch a movie with my officemates and have dinner afterwards. I could choose to just stay at home and watch TV, without worrying about those who worry about me.
During all my school years, I was never the type who would stay out late. I was happy staying at home and watching TV. Aside from the retreats, I can remember only 2 overnights when I was in college – one was for a project and the other one was for a deliberation for an organization. I seldom stay late, just for those occasional Christmas parties, school programs and the like. Asking permission was never an issue since I choose to stay at home.
Don’t get me wrong, I still get to choose. But being that person who wouldn’t want others to worry about me, I choose to restrict my choices. Unlike before when all I had to think of was me and work, I now take into consideration other factors as well.
Nevertheless, I am not complaining because I know I am blessed. A number of people in this world would love to be in my position – to be surrounded by such persons who are so concerned about me. I am grateful because I have lived and living this kind of life. I am thankful because I got the chance to be independent in varying degrees.
I may not be totally free nor do I wish for that one ultimate independence day. But it does not mean am not independent because I feel I am. And that is what is important :)
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